Mommies are mad.

First there was Maria Kang who put a picture of her chiseled body and her three young children out with the caption “What’s Your Excuse?” and everyone freaked out thinking she was fat-shaming and creating unrealistic expectations about post-baby bodies. Now there is Caroline Berg Eriksen who posted her flat-stomach selfie in her undies four days after giving birth and it has been called “obscene” and “an act of war”.

Yes, mommies are mad – and kind of missing the point.

When we look at photos of these strong mommies, how are we focused on anything other that the fact that she just made a person? She is a goddess and another human being just emerged from that body. She is a creator. Her amazing body has worked exactly how its majestic nature is meant to, which is nothing less than remarkable. She is a warrior in stretch pants (or undies as the case may be).

That is what we should be focused on.

These women are clearly blessed with great genetics and they deserve a lot of credit for taking fitness so seriously, but to say they are waging war seems a little crazy. Maybe, just maybe, they are on their journey and it is not all about you. They are living their lives and not waging war.

When Caroline posted a picture of herself four days after her delivery, she did it with the caption “I feel so empty, and still not.” That feels true to me – a sentiment I have felt when I know my little friend is no longer with me in the same way. It seems like a universal feeling for those who have used their bodies to create life, not an obscene comment.

Can’t we just be a little more open minded and tolerant and accept these women for exactly who they are? If we aren’t supporting moms who are fit after pregnancy, we aren’t supporting moms. And that is a mistake.

New moms need support. All new moms.

We don’t really know these women from a two-dimensional image. We don’t know about their happiness or their struggles. Let’s just assume they are doing their conflicted best and fighting the good mommy fight like the rest of us.

Aren’t we criticizing these women for saying moms should look a certain way after giving birth, all while telling them they should look a certain way after giving birth?

I understand the pushback against the pressure to be fit, thin, sexy – or anything other than what and who you choose to be after giving birth. The choice is a personal one and no pressure need apply.

Disingenuous women who lose baby weight through starvation and surgery and then tell people it is through exercise and “eating right” are being fairly criticized (I am looking at you Tori Spelling and Kim Kardashian). Lying about how you treat your body – that creates unfair expectations, and that is what we in the business call EVIL.

I have had four babies from my body, and I didn’t look like these women after any of my pregnancies, or before any of my pregnancies, or now – but that is not the point. The point is that I wouldn’t give up any part of my body or myself for the remarkable bodies these women have – I love myself too much.

Maybe if we all focused on loving ourselves a little more, we could hate these women a little less.

Maybe if all warriors in stretch pants supported each other, the world would be a better place for all moms and children.

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